Need to get some emotions out.

After Facebooking since last night, I needed to write all my thoughts in one place.
Picture Tim and Jordan snuggled on the couch, Jay laying on the floor, me in my chair, Gabe in bed as he had a slight fever and a cough, and we are watching the TV intently just in case there is another funny Super Bowl commercial. Then up comes the soft sound of Asian music, and then a Chinese/Asian woman on the screen. Inside I have that "oh cool, something Asian" feeling. And then I am stunned. Felt completely sideswiped. I look at Tim and he looks at me and then the anger hits. I even say to Tim, "Did I really just see that??" He is just shaking his head, just as shocked as I am. My first thought was "How dumb was that!" and then I was angry.
You see, our family is Chinese American. One of us was born in China, to Chinese birth parents, lived in China for the first 3.5 years of his life. My son is 100% Chinese. Now, we love all things China. (There is an exception and I will get to that in a bit) We celebrate major Chinese holidays, we all have Chinese clothing, we have Chinese house decorations... We read books to Gabe about China, show him photos of the beautiful buildings, the Great Wall, the land...
My ancestors come from Lithuania and Germany. My dad had a family tree that you could track all the way back to Germany. Every now and then, my mom would make a Lithuanian dish and I still cannot choke down German-potato salad, but it was a way of celebrating our family's heritage.

Today, my mind is whirling. I am still angry, but I am sad. Sad for my son, sad for all the Asian adoptees, sad for all the Asian-Americans of the US, even sad for the foreign exchange students here in the US. It is not the content I object to. It is the delievery. I get that people are upset with our country's unemployment rate (I live in Michigan -- we know about unemployment. MI is 41 out of 51 in the US for highest UE rate). I get how angry people are that jobs are going over seas. But really, whose fault is it? If someone came here today and offered me a free restaurant, that made great profits, and I could hire all my friends and family for good money, why wouldn't I take it?? We have jobs here in the US, even in our county that are given to illegal immigrants. Why? Oh yeah, they can pay them a ton less. They even give them housing. That is ok I guess, mainly because if Pete brought that to light, he would have lost many farmers votes-oh Caucasian votes. In Pete's messages and other articles he is also putting fear in peoples minds by telling us that we should be scared and threatened that China holds the highest amount of US foreign debt. Again, whose fault is this? Many of his other articles on his page, are about how China is a 'threat' to US security-they lent the money, but WE TOOK IT! In college and the few years after, Tim and I got ourselves into a large amount of credit card debt. It was the Credit Card companies faults, correct? Not ours. They told us all the rules sure, but they gave us the cards, so they were asking for it, right?? Oh, wait, I spent the money...I knew what I was doing. I spent the money! The US spent the money, money we didn't/don't have. China bailed us out, we asked them to lend us the money, we knew the terms and kept on spending and borrowing. Our leaders did this.
I have one more thought. As I stated above, we love all things China. BUT, we do not love their government. We do not love how the government treats their people. I really do not love the one-child policy. I do not love the lack of special needs access and health care that forced my son's birth mother to give him to the orphanage. I do not love that they persecute Christians (They do have and hold christian services in China, many adoptive parents have attended), I do not love that they sensor so much of what their public sees/hears. I do not love that they are a communist nation. I do not agree with their government or politics...HOWEVER...
I love the culture of the people, the history, the land. My son's birth country. I love my Chinese son. I love his dark skin, his almond eyes, his black hair. His culture is not responsible for our economy and he is not a reflection of the Chinese Government. Just as the citizens of the US are not a reflection of everything our leaders do.
I did find it hurtful and down right wrong. It was beyond dirty and bad politics. What a waste of money that could have gone to much much better things. I am also mad at the actress in the commercial, she also should be ashamed. The smirk on her face, combined with "We take your jobs." gave permission to narrow minded, bigoted people an excuse for hate. China cannot "take" what we do not "give". But, it is easier to blame others than to have integrity.
But, some will say it was the truth. Some will say it was 'just' a commercial. I did not see it that way...I saw it as a way to fuel hate against one race of humans. We used to think that was wrong...when did it become OK??

If you have not seen the commercial, see it http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/cutline/really-really-dumb-super-bowl-ad-mich-senate-172713855.html Although, it really is a waste of 30 seconds of your life that you cannot get back.