The Real Face of Special Needs {Friday}

Today I thought I would share Gabe's story...So, for those of you who know us well, you may have already read this:

Gabe’s Story

While Tim and I were paper-chasing we knew from the get go that we would be adopting special needs, so even before we submitted our dossier we filled out our special needs checklist. Our agency didn't want us to submit it though until we submitted our dossier. We had checked all the minor needs and maybe one of the moderate needs. We put in our original home study that we would love to bring another daughter into our family 1-3 yrs. And so we paper chased...Then something happened, God laid on my heart that our son was in China. After doing some research we found that there were huge numbers of boys waiting for homes and that there were very few families who wanted to adopt boys. Tim and I talked and after a few days we both agreed to tell our social worker that either gender would be wonderful and raised our age to 4 yrs. Then shortly before we were due to submit our dossier our agency held an event in which they invited families that had already adopted special needs children with various SN’s and from various countries. We went and had a wonderful time talking to families about their children. What a true picture of families with needs that we thought would be too much for us. We looked at each other and said. "wow". So many needs that we thought we knew, but really didn’t. We could do this. That night changed our lives as we added vision impairments and hepatitis B to our list.

The day I got the call for our son, I was at school and had to wait until 3pm until Tim could get to school and we opened the email together. We took one look at his big beautiful eyes and we knew that this was our son! He was almost 3 and had congenital glaucoma of both eyes. His report was conflicting, but we knew that no matter what his vision, he was ours. With Gods help we knew we were safe in this step of faith. We gave our preliminary yes and then waited for our pediatrician and ophthalmologist to tell us what they thought of his file. They both thought he looked good, but our ophthalmologist saw the same things we did-they referred to him seeing, but also said things like, “but due to his blindness”. So, we went into this knowing that he could be blind. At 8 months he had had a trabeculectomy to relive his glaucoma (drained the fluid in his eyes which causes the pressure), but he went 8 months with the damage being done. I began research, talked with our ISD professionals and prayed for our son while we waited to bring him home. We chose an American name for him, Gabriel Alan Xulu Danielson. Alan is Tim’s and his dad’s middle name.

On September 9th, 2009 we flew half a world away to Beijing China, and on September 14th, 2009 we hugged our son for the first time and watched as he played with the cars we gave him-he could see them!! He had to hold them very close, but he could see! Su Xulu was ready for us and he told his caregivers on the way to the civil affairs office that his Baba and Mama were coming for him and they could come to dinner with us if they wanted. He never looked back. Each day has been a new adventure and none of us could ever imagine a time without him.

Today our Gabe wears glasses for his near-sightedness and myopia. We go to the pediatric ophthalmologist 2 times per year and one of those visits is a pressure check under anesthesia. Right now his pressure is normal and at last check the doctor considered his surgery a complete success! We ‘could’ face bigger obstacles in the future-will he be able to drive? How will this effect him in school? If his pressure ever does rise, will drops work? It is the elephant in the room, but God will carry us through all of the unknowns and will grant us the courage to face each day as it comes! It amazes me that this need is not one that we think about daily or even weekly. Each morning we put on his glasses and that is all. Occasionally we have to get his glasses adjusted and clean them daily, but most days I think, “What special need?” I praise God that he opened our hearts and minds to vision impairments otherwise we would not have our rough and tumble, awesome son with the biggest beautiful eyes that completely warm your heart! We have been home for a little over a year and a half. Gabe attends 1/2 day preschool, has learned English amazingly well, loves to play outside and with his big brother, and has the best "squeezer hug". He will wrap his arms around you and hug with all his might and tells me "I lub you sooooooo mucha!"


To join in The Real Face of Special Needs Friday, click on the link at the top and link up at Hope for Elisyn.